I have a confession to make. I hate surprises. Well, I love them so long as I don't know they are coming, but the anxiety around surprises, where the outcome is unexpected, well, I'm just buzzing beyond what my heart can handle.
I blame a book I used to read in the dark, dimly lit upstairs bedroom at my grandparents--the one with the creaky floors, slanted ceilings, a tiny window and mysterious wallpaper. The bedroom where I was supposed to be sleeping, but sat with the dim little lamp on reading my mother's old storybooks, hoping not to get caught for... gasp! reading!
The story was a book about a mysterious box that arrives by post with a tag stating NOT to open it. There is a lot of speculation about what could be in the box, friends surround to guess.... dreams and nightmares ensue. The unfortunate ending is that you NEVER FIND OUT "WHAT'S IN THE BOX!" It was made all the more creepy by the associations I made with the room I was reading it in and the time of day. (In fact, I think all of those old storybooks I found in that room a little creepy, but they likely weren't!)
I think this book semi-traumatized me into anxiety around all sorts of surprises. So much so that around Christmas as a kid, I would try to find hidden Christmas presents. And once, I even opened up the corner of a Christmas present just so I could have a peek!
But, before Gabriel was born, we decided not to find out. Surprisingly, the anticipation of WHAT Gabriel would be didn't kill me. But this time, I just couldn't wait!!! Today we found out. But for now, we'll leave you wondering. What's is it?!?!? Aren't you curious? Don't you want to know?
Is it a boy? Or is it a girl?
First of all!!! I don't really think anyone cares. Second of all why are you exposing your family on the Internet??? Do you not have anything else better to do then to sit in front of a computer screen??! And post fabricated pictures? reality check!
ReplyDelete